Years have gone by and I've finally learned to accept myself for who I am: a beggar for good soccer. I go about the world, hand outstretched, and in the stadiums I plead: "A pretty move, for the love of God."
And when good soccer happens, I give thanks for the miracle and I don't give a damn which team or country performs it.
This is just too hilarious to even try to describe. Simply read it... and weep with uncomfortable laughter. Man, it must suck to be a Magpie supporter right now:
